Beauty Pageants

Home » Headline

Jim O’Neill’s a snedge funder? He funds snedgin?…

Submitted by on March 11, 2010 – 11:58 amOne Comment

It was reported about an injured player on the fc-utd.co.uk official website that:

‘Fradgley went to hospital as a precaution but he was released soon afterwards with no major problems.’

James Fradgley, an Ossett Town player, was taken off the pitch much-poo-poo-poorly during our game against Ossett Town the other Wednesday night. I think that the FC United of Manchester website was being political correctness gone mad again when it stated that Mr Fradgley ‘was released soon afterwards with no major problems.’

There you have our democratically-elected, lefty leadership again too afraid to put into words what the ‘you-know-it-makes-sense’ fan is thinking. Mr Fradgley has got major problems and will continue to have major problems as his name, by virtue of it being his name, veers very close to being Mr Fadgley.

They couldn’t even say ‘Due to the extenuating circumstances of Mr Fadgley’s name he will always make a bit of a c-word of himself’ and use the words ‘the c-word’ instead of the word count.

If it wasn’t for the word ‘*snedgin’ – which no one really knows what it means, which is its adjective’y beauty – then ‘Fradgley’ would win the most Yorkshire word in Yorkshire competition every year. And fck knows them Inspector Fadgets from FC United of Manchester’s Benghazi Yorkshire firm of supporters know a few contenders that enter that competition as they’re a right lummoxing load of **as-you-dos.

It’s at this point that I should do a quick paragraph to summarise the quick online article. Unfortunately what you don’t know, but I do, is that not long down this article I put the word ‘whom’. It’s put me off so I’m ending it here without a quick summary. Don’t fckn moan it’s a fckn free website you quer counts.

*I have to say that I’m an ardent admirer of the word ‘snedgin.’ I should use it more but, as in saying ‘I should have pancakes more’ on Pancake Tuesday and then never doing so for a year, we all say that.

Perhaps it’s because, and even in spite of its backward home of origin, it continues to be rebellious as it refuses to be categorised into any page of the Oxford English dictionary, even the right-on-down-with-the-kids-fc-utd.co.uk-friendly bit that comes up with Walshy-words from the ‘ghetto’.

**Except for the infamous George fromYorkshire as he’s just curly haired and cute and not in anyway an as-you-do. Aww, if you don’t know him then try as his DNA is overwhelmingly puppy. When Mr Fadgley was injured we should have sent George from Yorkshire on the pitch with some rum around his neck. He’d have drunk it though. Then shit on the pitch. George not Mr Fadgley. He’s got enough major problems. Mr Fadgley not George. Actually I’m snedgingly snedged here as I don’t know whom I mean.

I just used the word ‘whom’ because the corrector told me to. What a fadge.

*** This bit just got three asterisks for no reason as I didn’t put three asterisks in the article. The only reason that it got three asterisks – thereby negating the previous sentence as it does have a reason – is that it reminds me of a lad I know called One-Off. He was from Norfolk somewhere. I once saw him get on a bus attempting to go to Hulme. He could only say ‘Hoom’ as in rhyming with ‘whom’ and using the word ‘whom’ reminded me of the occasion. The driver didn’t have a fckn jar what he was on about. Very funny and a shame it ended. But it was in the 80s so we wouldn’t want a driver not going home to his family for twenty odd years just for comedy value. Although he could have considered it, the Varney-gobbed-get.

This article feels as if it should have ended in the 80s it’s been that long. I could have called it ‘for Hulme the bellends toll’ but I didn’t. I thought I’d get a topical reference in about the ‘Good-jeesus-we-have-to-put-our-footballing-trust-in-these-?ers’.  I’m going for an adult nap. Which is just an ordinary nap except that there’s a snedge in it. And probably some fond hint of fadge. No knights obviously as that’s just gay bob note…

One Comment »

Leave a comment!

You must be logged in to post a comment.