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CYCM: Think about the future…

Submitted by on July 28, 2014 – 9:35 amNo Comment


Over the last few weeks those behind Course You Can Malcolm (FC United’s club night in the afternoon, taking place before Saturday home games), have been inundated with questions about the event’s future in the new ground at Moston.

Those familiar with the event don’t require a recap, but those not versed in the unique and pioneering happenings may like to be initiated, while the suitably familiarised can also enjoy a lovely summation, by the person who came up with the idea in the first place.

Talking about the original proposal put to the board back in 2007, someone with a big nose who knows said: “That proposal contained the first outing of the phrase ‘Anyone who knows anything about football knows that football is not about football. Anyone who does not know that knows nothing about football’ and I think that was proudly, outrageously apt.

“If you never understood those sentiments then you never really understood Malcolmses. That non-understanding of some is just smartacus though as we all live our United in our own Unitedy way. However, just as some never really understand the idiosyncratic proceedings of the event there was a substantial number of our membership that did. At the first ever meeting of the Malcomses volunteers it was stated by one but agreed by all, that we shouldn’t let the till be our guide. If this Manchester-club-night-in-the-afternoon-at-the-wrong-end-of the-tram-tracks didn’t make a penny for the club then that would have to be so. Its Mancunian cultural value was worth more than any pile of ten bob notes in a duffel bag.

“As it turned out, this socialist hippy-love blanket-with-mixed-blend-bobbly-bits drew the social romantics, the sken-like-a-basket-of-whelks dreamy, the wiff-buckets, the roll-ends, the not-wipes, the bear’s couch chrysanthemums and the storm tossed … and a love story unfolded. It was protected from the dry and flavourless elements around us because it ossified into a proper midden full of money for the club for the last seven years thus appeasing those interested in that side of things.”


Over the years this vision has honed a reality of wonderful performances from a host of musicians, poets, writers, comics, thinkers, dreamers and a talking dog that didn’t talk. A true tertulia, in a mancunian hybrid of the word so widely used in the latin world.

Those appearing included Maxine Peake, Josephine Oniyama, Wu Lyf, Aziz Ibrahim. Space Monkeys, Gideon Conn, Slow Readers’ Club, International One, Mike Duff, Tony ‘Longfella’ Walsh, The Naughtys, Mick Middles, Rebecca Joy-Sharp, Maurice Twomowers, David Conn, Aarron Brown, Mark Metcalf of the Orgreave Justice Campaign, Revenge of the Psychotronic Man, Moston Active Drama and many, many more generous and lovingly-talented people who provided their creativity for freemans because they got what the event was about.

As Space Monkeys frontman Richard McNevin-Duff said after his performance at the last ever Gigg Lane CYCM: “Malcolmses is unique, long may it continue, all the best things in life. Anyone looking to re-affirm their love of football, life, music, should get down to FC United. Beautiful day from start to finish.” He added: “It truly opens your eyes to what is good in life. Cancelled my SkyTV…”

Reading and that...

Reading and that…

The volunteers, in the very perfect example of what FC United is about to a great many of those interested in the club, grafted, organised and enjoyed their part in making things happen. Not for any financial gain, but for love and pleasure at being part of something so creatively wonderful, free from the commercial evils that have turned our world into a cesspit of greed. This should be cherished in FC United’s future, as it already is in its past.

Those attending came from a huge and proudly mixed cross section of Manchester and surrounding areas. Some people had no interest in football, they came purely to enjoy the occasion. Some people had an interest in football, but only decided to trek to Bury because there was more on offer than 22 blokes running about and a couple of thousand singing their names.

Furthermore, Malcomses is something visitors to the club have to a man/woman raved about and this has had untold benefits for FC United. Word spreads fast in the musical community and Malcomses has gained a reputation that many events struggle to attain over a far longer period. Consequently other FC United events have managed to attract bands interested in the club as a result of the work done at Malcolmses.

FC United means a great many different things to a great many different people. That is one of the things that makes the club so wonderful, and what still marks it out as different. We must fight to keep it that way. Malcolms has provided a haven for those of a certain thinking and thankfully they number a good percentage of FC United’s match-going fans. Not everyone likes it and those that don’t will have ample alternatives, but for those that do Malcolmses is integral.

As to the queries over the future… The organisers are in continued contact with the board of FC United in the hope of sorting something out at Broadhurst Park, preferably in the as-yet unclaimed and vacant area under the St Mary’s Road (home) End. A formal proposal was set to be discussed by the board this month and organisers of CYCM will receive a response soon. The club has a tough job and must abide by the wishes of as many of its members as possible. It is not easy, so bear with them as they weigh up options for matchday events in our new home.


We hope our proposal, which is a detailed extension of the plans we originally published in issue eight of AFL back in early 2012 (see below for link), will be backed and supported. That FC United can continue to be a pioneering club, which puts, to borrow McNevin-Duff’s quote, all the best things in life at forefront of everything it does. We trust it will.

AFL has raised a decent amount through sales of the magazine, coach trips and other daft things to put towards a community facility at St Mary’s Road, for use by all, but capable of housing CYCM on Saturday home games. We will keep our readers and the kind well-wishers informed of any developments.

Here is our original proposal from early 2012: Home is where the art is

Malcolmses favourite Gideon Conn

Malcolmses favourite Gideon Conn


Wu Lyf

Wu Lyf

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