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CYCM 29/03/14: Bath Night in the Afternoon

Submitted by on March 26, 2014 – 6:19 pmNo Comment

Alright, bathing fans, the moment you’ve been dreaming of for so long has arrived: we’re finally going to talk bath tubs. Now before you start getting carried away wondering “Will there be a mention of undermount baths?”, or “Surely there’ll be a discussion on the merits of acrylic thermoforming”, let me stop you right there. As we all know, there’s only ever one tub worth mentioning, and that of course, is the timeless classic, the Clawfoot tub (come on, like it was going to be anything else). It was entrepreneur David Buick that paved the way for this porcelain leviathan, when he invented the process for bonding enamel to cast iron in the 1880s. A bath unlike any other, it would have made the Romans green with envy, with its classic, free standing form offering options fixed baths can only dream of.


Matlock-Bath-which-is-actually-seperate-from-the-town-of-Matlock-but-let’s-ignore-that FC, are the guests at Gigg Lane this week, and it’s well known the town was named after the Clawfoot tub (don’t bother looking it up; this may not be true). Meanwhile, in the salubrious surroundings of Starkies Bar, CYCM hosts its own guests: band The Hart Room, and author and journalist Mark Metcalf, who’ll be talking about the Orgreave Truth and Justice Campaign. And this is how it’ll all pan out:

10:30 The sweat inducing lugging the Oddies do every Saturday getting all the gear from the main stand leaves them needing a bath

11:30 Mike Noodle never needs a bath from having the meat sweats, and you’ll know why when you taste his home made veggie pizza and veggie hot dogs

12:00 Doors open

12:15 If there’s one thing Dave Frilly doesn’t want, it’s to have a bath after bringing the cheese and onion pies and tater ‘ash from Westwells. That’s an aroma you want clinging to you

1:30 Mark Metcalf- see below

2:00 Taking You Round The Corner- The lies flow as free as water from a tap

2:20 The Hart Room- see below

3:00 Splish splash, I was taking a bath. And I missed kick off

3:45 Early bath: for any players sent off, anyway. For the rest of you, it’s back in for more food and drink

Lesley Boulton

With 2014 marking the thirtieth anniversary of the Miners’ strike, we’re thrilled to announce author and journalist Mark Metcalf will be coming along to talk about the Orgreave Truth and Justice Campaign. Mark, who writes for Unite the union and Big Issue, has penned thirteen football books and is set to publish ‘Images of the Past: The Miners’ Strike’, will be discussing the infamous Battle of Orgreave.

The confrontation, the bloodiest of all the strikes during the battle to oppose Margaret Thatcher’s decimation of the mining industry, is steeped in controversy. South Yorkshire Police, led by chief constable Peter Wright (the same force and chief constable responsible for the Hillsborough disaster five years later, co-incidentally, honest), were accused of purposely engineering the clash at the Orgreave coking plant. Seventy one miners were subsequently charged with riot and a further twenty four with violent disorder, despite footage clearly showing officers attacking miners with batons and charging on horseback.


Unsurprisingly, the case against the ninety five accused collapsed, with South Yorkshire police paying out £425,000 to them in compensation. You’ll also no doubt be shocked and amazed to learn copies of police statements recently obtained by the BBC reveal that many contained identical descriptions. To find out more, you can visit Mark’s website here and the Orgreave Truth and Justice Campaign website here.

Music this week comes in the form of rock and roll tune-age from Mancunian trio The Hart Room. Now we don’t have that much info on them, but you can have a look at their website, and also find them on Facebook. What we can tell you though, is we have it on good authority they’re downright smart, and they made the effort to come down and visit us last time round to see what we’re all about. Which was lovely.

Hart to Hart

Following all this, Taking You Round The Corner returns once more. Last time it led the Malcolms crowd on a merry dance round the corner, with not a single person picking out the fact from the plethora of lies (bit embarrassing that, innit?). There’s a chance to right that wrong though, with this week’s Matlock themed quiz. You’ve got to be in it to win it, and all that gubbins.

And finally, we’ve been inundated with requests from people who didn’t get to see Stu From The Bay’s new programme/fanzine holders last time. Fear not though, because they’ll be back again, and if you ask nicely, Stu will allow you to pose for a photo with them. You can also pick up the usual hats, t-shirts and books from the best market stall outside of Bury market (but still in Bury).

So that, my friends, is this week’s Malcolms. It’s another jam packed edition, so make sure you get  in nice and early, and settle yourself  in for an afternoon of music, history and beery sustenance. And if there are any cockernee Reds in attendance, and you hear them say “Matlock Baaarf”. Forgive them. They know not what they say.

Four and we’re knocking on the door….

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