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CYCM 28/09/13: Vampire Bonus Weekend

Submitted by on September 25, 2013 – 8:37 pmNo Comment

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2010 aside, we’re not that partial to cup runs at FC United of Manchester. Bad news for you “I only come to discuss football issues such as where the false nine should be deployed behind the Libero” types perhaps, but good news for the assortment of oddballs, malingerers and ne’er do wells that make up the Malcolms regulars. FA cup defeat has freed up this Saturday to now pan out as follows:

10:30 The first wave of Oddies arrive to de-Bury Starkies and infuse it with a streak of Mancunian rebellion

12:00 Doors open

12:30 Dave Frilly brings the food from Westwells in his gravy stained car to the strains of Kings of Leon disco remixes

1:45 Author Andy Davies does a reading from his new book ‘City of Gangs’- see below

2:15 ‘Taking You Round the Corner’ gets you to sink your teeth (token Dracula reference, keep up at the back) into Whitby fact and fiction

2:30 Horses on the Move- see below

3:00 Margy displays a level of pitch-side sartorial elegance that a certain ginger Scotsman can only dream of attaining

3:45 Back to ours (which is also yours) for more food and drink

The first non-football-at-the-football entertainment starts with author and FCUM regular Andy Davies treating us to a reading of his new book ‘City of Gangs’ (which he’ll also have a few copies for sale). It delves into the Glaswegian gangs of the 20’s and 30’s such as The Billy Boys and Savoy Arcadians, and has caused a right old stir north of the border.

City of GangsNot only is it (get this) published by the company who do Stephen King’s books, but following the success of his last book ‘The Gangs of Manchester’,  Andy also went and got himself an agent, who he shares with Tara Palmer Tompkins or summat (no idea who she is, but appaz she’s proper famous). Before he gets big headed about being a proper boffin though, it should be noted he still loses his tram ticket every day and therefore pays twice, as since he moved to Chorlton he is too posh to jib…

Following these tales of dastardly criminality, it’s straight on to ‘Taking you round the corner’. Last time round, Malcolms regulars showed themselves up in horrendous fashion by failing to spot the fact Henry Tate was born in Chorley. The result of this embarrassment was not only a room full of dripping, eggy faces, but the prize lay unclaimed, meaning there’s the extra bonus of double spoils on offer this time round.

Live music  then makes its welcome return in the form of ‘Technicolour Country sounds from Ramsbottom’ courtesy of Horses on the Move. They deserve an extra special welcome as singer and guitarist Damien has given up his ticket at Old Trafford this Saturday to play for us (for freemans, too). This club of ours has always required sacrifices, but pays it back with oodles of Red love and warmth, so please make sure these moving, musicals horses are given your fullest appreciation.

You can also find more out about the band on Facebook, and Twitter on @Horsesmove. Just make sure you don’t put in @Horsemove or @Horsesonthemove like I did and end up following two of Staffordshire’s finest horse transportation companies. Though I’m sure they’ll appreciate the follow, and if you’re looking to get some horses moved, these are the people to ask. Unless you’re going to a glue factory, obv.

Moving Gee Gees

And finally, a bit of an announcement….

To address the issue of rising beer costs at the suppliers, but also being mindful of FC United’s commitment to affordability for all, we’ve devised a new approach to pricing pre-match alcoholic refreshment.

It henceforth shall be known as ’It’s your shout…’ In a similar vein to FCUM’s universally lauded ’pay what you can afford’ season ticket policy, we’re to trial a system that allows people to pay what they can afford for beer.

The minimum contribution for the bottles will remain at £2, the price of beer since the very inception of CYCM and the Main Stand Inn, but from now on we’ll ask those who can afford it to pay the club’s recommended amount of £2.50 or more in order to help us as we make the final charge towards Moston.

The recommended £2.50 cost will mitigate supplier price rises and will also offset the price for those who are struggling financially. If people wish to pay even more than £2.50, they are very welcome. The £2 minimum will ensure that everyone can still afford a drink pre-match, whatever their financial situation.

We hope supporters will back ’It’s your shout…’ and we trust you all appreciate the effort that has gone into it from all at the club in order to balance the financial realities, while also remaining true to our principles of affordable football.

’It’s your shout…’ will start this Saturday, and we’ll assess and report on its success during the coming months.

As always, doors open from 12, and the usual rules of members plus one guest apply. It’ll be a cavalcade of gangsters, vampires, horses and that proper smart Sampdoria kit Whitby like to wear. Eee, I’ve come over all giddy all of a sudden.

If you like what you see/hear of Horses on the Move on Saturday, they’re also playing Bury Met on Friday 4th October, Tickets £8. Ta.

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