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Submitted by on April 3, 2013 – 7:56 amOne Comment

kendal_castleWebI’d never been to Kendal in the light before so I was intrigued to see what it looked like. But what I wasn’t expecting was a day of politics. One of the most enjoyable things about football supporting is the unrestrained and mostly unjustified abuse one is allowed to pour upon the ref and opposition players.

But Kendal god bless them gave me and many others the opportunity to pour justified abuse and scorn on a real live Tory/Lib scum-bag politician.

On the coach I was told how the Tory/Lib scum-bags had objected to the BBC calling the bedroom tax the bedroom tax because the Tory/Lib scum-bags claimed it might upset people who were not eligible to pay the bedroom tax. The fact that it upset the people who are forced to pay the blatantly inequitable bedroom tax matters little to the defenders of the rich.

During the first half the defenders of the MRE disgraced themselves with the invention of a clearly misogynistic chant. Being an MRE regular I was outraged, I love being able to chant the only one word warble I know, ‘bollocks’. But this new seemingly harmless recital panders to the stereotype that only men enjoy football. I’d much rather attend a match that was dominated by women not by men, men are tossers.stop-bed-taxWeb

Tim Farron, Liberal/Tory MP for Kendal, appeared as the goalie for the half-time fundraiser for Riverside FC, a fully disabled football team. This was probably the best bit of the day, it’s not often that you get the chance to shout abuse at a real live Tory twat. We all know that politicians are hypocrites, that’s their job. But this wanker took the biscuit. He was taking his photo opportunity, shaking hands with these disabled players while at the same time supporting a government that closed down Remploy, throwing hundreds of disabled workers on the dole, cut benefits to disabled people forcing them into even greater levels of poverty, and slashed health care provision turning an already struggling life into misery.

riverside-FCWebHis goalie effects were as pathetic as his political masters, he pretended to let goals in, even at one point catching the ball and throwing it into the net, the patronising toss pot. He didn’t know what he was doing, which seemed an apt epitaph to his political career.

This momentous event was followed by a fellow FC fan explaining to me the difference between chicken stew, chicken casserole and chicken chasseur, such is the diversity of the footballing community. It was also rumoured that the official FC United twitter feed thanked our glorious hypocrite and tory scum-bag for being at the match. I find this hard to believe because what were we thanking him for? For sacking disabled workers? For cutting their benefits? Or for simply making their life hell by withdrawing vital health care? No, FC United of Manchester would never do such a thing. I don’t believe it.

The day meandered on only to be disturbed by the stick throwing incident and the missing sticker. The stick/twig throwing was being practised by a few local would-be hoolies who didn’t know what they were doing and really needed a trip to Frickley to learn how to brick a bus. Twigs don’t have the same terror impact as a brick being thrown at your bus window. But I suppose we all have to start somewhere.

The case of the missing sticker caused much fuss and acrimony. The driver even threatened to chop the fingers off someone he believed to be trying to remove his precious expression of his manhood.

That was Kendal that was.

One Comment »

  • TH says:

    Just to clarify – the official FC twitter feed didn’t thank Farron. It referred to his support for fan-ownership.

    Here is the tweet:

    FC United Manchester ‏@FCUnitedMcr 30 Mar
    Just spotted @timfarron here who has spoken out in Parliament in favour of supporter ownership in the past.

    Otherwise, I couldn’t agree more with the criticism of the hypocrisy the Tory collaborator showed on Saturday. Quite disgusting patronising of disabled people with one hand helping their shots into the net, while the other hand was taking away their life support net…

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