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Telly Guide 5/4/2010

Submitted by on April 5, 2010 – 12:33 pm9 Comments

Did i mention last week that i was moving the telly guide to Monday nights? no, well let’s not dwell on who forgot to tell whom and plough through this shit one more time. University Challenge (BBC2 8pm) is the final tonight Oxford Vs Cambridge… a pox on both their houses as far as i’m concerned. It’s very easy to dislike ricky gervais, i’ts that ubiquitisness, my spell-check is flagging that word, and it’s probably right to, of people as they go from entertaining funnyman to ‘christ this fucker is on tv again’ but i will always hold a soft spot for ricky for him introducing one of, if not the funniest characters in British comedy to our screens – Finchy, from The Office. Unfortunately he doesn’t appear in  Extras, Series 1 (BBC2 from 9pm) though… i can’t remember if it was any use or  not, i remember the Ian McKellen tips for acting ‘i like to pretend i am the person’ but not any from the first series, just as well as it’s on tonight again in its entirety. And if that proves to be a festival of unfunny, Richard Pryor Live in Concert (BBC2 00:30) is the 1979 concert. Channel 4′s Comedy Gala (Channel4 9pm) looks less funny, Michael McIntyre, Lee Evans, Bill Bailey and Sean Lock. With Caddyshack (ITV 23:15) there should be no reason to be watching Frank Skinner Live (Channel 4 23:05) but to be honest the ‘daft romantic comedy starring sandra bullock and keanu reeves’ on BBC1 (The Lake House (BBC1 22:50)) would get my vote over Frank Skinner. Blades of Glory (BBC3 22:30) is on, if Will Ferrell is your thing and i have to admit, despite knowing that every film is the same i do kinda like them, this is entertaining enough if nothing else grabs you.

Radio – The Record Producers (Radio2 10pm) is Bernard Butler talking about the influence that The Smiths had on him as a musician. I wonder will it then explain why all of Bernard’s music has been utter shit?

Tuesday
First up is a repeat of the last in series of Wonders of the Solar System (BBC2  7PM) which you could watch, or you could get a full rundown of the entire series in this rather wonderful spoof. Also a last in the series for The Man Who Cycled the Americas (BBC1 22:35). Dylan Moran: What it is (Channel 4 23:05) I must admit to being a bit of a Dylan Moran fan and went to see it live, can’t remember a damn thing about it though – will give this a watch. Highlight of the day is once again the True Stories series on More4 True Stories: Starsuckers (More4 10pm) here’s the trailer

Wednesday
Live UEFA Champions League Manchester Utd. Vs Bayern Munich(ITV1 19:30) and Sean Lock: Stand Up (Channel 4 11:05) is it worth my while mentioning anything else?

Thursday
Museum of Life (BBC2 8pm) continues to entertain me anyway even if the rest of you stopped watching it – Liverpool vs Benfica (Five 19:30) is on the other side, i know which i will be watching. Live Golf (BBC1 22:35) – now golf is irredeemably shit – i’m not going to tell you otherwise, but its Tiger’s return – i might allow myself to get caught up in the hype… or i might watch Get Carter (Five 22:15) instead (yeah, the original obv).  I heard someone talking recently about Outnumbered (BBC1 21:30) – can anyone tell me is it good? it’s completely passed me by. Dario Argento’s superb horror Suspiria (Film4 1:25) is a late show, but its worth a watch before the remake comes along and ruins everything.

Friday
Go out on Friday, really it’s not a good one – Ginger Snaps (BBC2 00:35) trailer here will be waiting for you when you get back in – or Day of the Jackal (ITV 01:05) but before that i would struggle to pick anything out. On the wireless Ruby Murray: the secret story of curry (Radio4 11am) at first looks interesting but as i read the press release i wonder is it really going to tell us we don’t already know? in fact this is the press release: “Vindaloo was the unofficial song of England’s 1998 World Cup team – an unlikely battle cry for English football fans. In April 2001, the then Foreign Secretary, Robin Cook, announced that “chicken tikka masala is now a true British national dish…”. In fact, chicken tikka masala is even included by the Ministry of Defence in its operational ration packs to give troops some home comfort. ” that sounds shit, forget i mentioned that – No, Friday is shit – go out.

Saturday
The Grand National (1pm BBC1)…… there is horse racing on today – maybe this could be turned into something interesting if you turn it into some sort of drinking  game where every time another horse racing cliche is ‘trotted’ out have to down a pint of meths… or toilet duck – anyway, here is a sneak preview of tomorrows coverage

For sporting cliches though, you really can’t beat the magic of the Live FA Cup (ITV 16:35), when the butchers and bakers of Aston Villa play the rent-boys of Chelsea.

Now i realise that not everyone loves Doctor Who (BBC1 18:15) but they are just killjoys, i stopped watching telly on saturday nights in 1986 as a tribute to Dustin Gee but it was Doctor Who that re-introduced me to saturday nights in front of the telly, first christopher ecclestone then after a bit of getting used to, david tenant, now a new one whose name i forget and i don’t think i like him.  See the thing with the doctors is, the ‘wacky’ factor – do you remember slyvester mccoy?  see that was not good doctoring right there, now david tenant did a little bit of wacky but could keep it under control – this new guy though?  he eats fish fingers with custard – BONKERS! – and tells us that ‘bow ties are cool’ – yeah if you are nation of islam, then bow ties are about as cool as it gets, Brother Mouzone in The Wire was THE coolest motherfucker there was, but for time travelling doctors? no…. unless they are Nation of Islam Time Traveling Doctors – in which case that would be the coolest show ever… but i digress… where was i? ah yes, the doctors assistant is the best one yet.


Great Expectations
(film4 14:55) the David Lean 1946 version, about as good as films get really.

I can’t do sunday because someone threw out the telly guide and i’m not happy.

next guide up on monday night

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